Just a Bit Nearsighted

Mondays are always busy, even though I schedule in a few hours with no lessons. The time slips by, and often all I actually manage to get into those hours is getting showered, dressed, and ready for the rest of the day. There is the occasional Monday where I'm a bit more organized and productive, and I would say today qualifies as one of those days. I scheduled an eye exam for Lydia to get glasses... her first pair. She's at the age I was when I got glasses, and there's been an obvious need. I picked her up at school, took her to the eye doctor, and what we already knew to be true was confirmed. She is nearsighted. Quite. She tried on several cute pairs of glasses before settling on a rectangular-ish set of brown frames. I meant to take a picture of her in them for my blog, but we forgot, so now I'll have to wait til they actually come in, some 7-10 days from now. She's very excited, and it'll be so nice for her to be able to see the world.

I remember getting glasses when I was her age. All of a sudden, my world had detail and clarity. The trees had leaves, the blades of grass were visible, and I could see everything. The memory of putting those glasses on and driving home that day left an impression that I still remember.

I've thought about memories a lot lately. Memories from my childhood are random, and it's difficult for me to remember experiences with vivid detail. Yesterday I received a friend invitation on Facebook from the guy I took to my Senior Prom. I accepted, and within minutes we were chatting and reminiscing. He could remember how I asked him, apparently it was a creative invitation to Prom (he was from another school), but I had absolutely no memory of what I did. I've also reconnected with other people from High School recently and realized that I remember THEM, and the fact that they were part of my life, but I only have flashes of memory of the things we DID. Why can't I remember more?

So I told Randall (my prom date)... My best guess is that I had so much on my plate at that time of my life that creating long-term memory of those experiences was too much for my brain to handle. In a way, my mind was experiencing nearsightedness, not being able to see things very far off. To this day, I think I live near-sightedly. I don't hold on to my past very long, and I don't even bother thinking far into the future. I live very much in the moment, I do my best to savor it while I have it, because one day I probably won't remember it.

So what can I remember? Here's a short list of some of my most indelible memories, the ones that have withstood my nearsighted mind.

• Going to the hospital to see my new sister Cathy
• Running down our long lane when I was late for the bus, with everybody on the bus watching and waiting
• Getting my first pair of glasses
• Getting contacts, and taking an hour to get them in or out
• My first kiss - It was short, but seriously, does anyone forget that?
• My second kiss - much longer than the first one
• Getting my heart broken, more times than I can count... but I can remember every time
• The birth of my babies - the most memorable of my life's experiences, a memory that has faded, but I cling to as the defining moments of my life
• The conversation where I learned my marriage was ending
• Musical memories - performing, listening, sharing - and these are memories that just pile on top of each other, too many to list, and they truly never seem to fade.

I guess I do remember some things. I just wish I could remember more, and that it was all as clear as thinking about what I did today. I think my favorite part of the day was taking Lydia out to lunch after her appointment and sitting across from my beautiful daughter thinking about how much I love her and cherish every moment of her childhood. It's too bad you can't get glasses for your memories. At my age, though, I probably need bifocals.